I care for you but it’s time we admit that our relationship is weighing us down. What was once fun, casual & illuminating has changed. We are only about heaviness now...and I find I am a casualty in a war you are waging with yourself.
When you like what you see in me you are happy, optimistic & confident. If you don't like what you see you are angry, sad and feel worthless. I wish I could be what you want me to be--but I can’t. I’M JUST NOT BUILT THAT WAY. All I do is measure the gravity pull on your physical person, so maybe we’d be different in a less pressured environment. But where would that be? Mars? The moon? I just don't know.
We barely communicate anymore. I am a simple machine & you step all over me. I have no idea what you’re made of. Muscle? Fat? Water? Are you literally full of crap? You see different things depending on recent meals, activity, sleep, hydration, stress, sodium intake, weather, time of day & hormonal cycles. When your number is up I don’t judge you. You do that to yourself.
This is our problem: you’re complex & I can’t read body composition. It’s a fact that a pound of muscle takes up less room than a pound of fat--but to me a pound is a pound. The more muscle you have the leaner you’ll look...but yeah, you'll weigh more. That’s a fact of nature. Sometimes I make empty promises and claim to know your body fat %. I shouldn’t do that. Hydration alone changes those numbers dramatically. I am a scale, I measure weight not worth. You’ll never be happy if you look at me to know your value. I cannot show you that number, it’s infinite.
I get sad when you talk about the future. You think the more you disappear the happier we will be. Cutting excess adipose tissue can be healthy but you think about it too much. We need boundaries. At the very least just accept my limitations, check my calibration and weigh in the morning on a flat surface--before eating or drinking (but after going to the bathroom).
I’ll always be here as a friend & resource. But I can't be your success-meter anymore. I want you to be happy. I want you to make & chase goals that build you--not just reduce you. My wish for you is that you love yourself and fixate less on being less & be more focused on being more YOU.